http://www.newgrounds.com/audio/listen /320992

As promised, I have posted "Newgrounds Chat" on the site today.

CosmicDeath and FBIPollux owe me a beer now.

It's finally "International Get Drunk Day"!

For those in "the know", I'll be hosting an online radio show via Raiogrounds and Stickam at 2:00 PM EST (that's the time zone NG is in).

If anyone wants to record any shout outs for me to play on the air, feel free to upload them somewhere and post the link in the comments of this page, just try and keep them short.

"International Get Drunk Day" is just 1 week away!!!

Things to do:

1) Buy lots of alchohol
2) Get several tubes of green food dye
3) ???????
4) Profit

And when the day arrives, don't forget to join the only online party hosted by a true 1/4 Irish ginger!

See my last news post for further details

As February draws to a close, we find ourselves approaching one of the greatest days ever, "International Get Drunk Day", also known by it's other names, "Buy Stock in Green Food Coloring Day" and the lesser known "St Patrick's Day".

This holiday dates back to 1738 when St Patrick invented green beer. This invention was an accident, occurring when the patron saint of Ireland ran out of milk for his Lucky Charms (wich at the time, only had the green shamrock marshmallows) and decided to substitute beer. As he finished his breakfast, he was amazed to discover his beer had turned green, and the rest is history.

Today we celebrate the holiday by putting green food coloring in anything liquid, and drinking any of these liquids that happen to contain alcohol in large gatherings.

I will be celebrating this most blessed day by doing simultaneous live broadcasts on Radiogrounds and Stickam, playing some music, drinking green beer, and possible nudity....

The show starts sometime around 2:00pm EST on March 17. If anything changes, I'll post a new blog.

It's Talk Like a Ninja Turtle Day!!!!!!! RADICAL!

YOU CAN ALL FINALLY QUIT BUGGING ME ABOUT FINISHING THE CHAT, IT IS DONE!

Click the chat link in the header to join in the fun.

HAHAHAHAH APRIL FOOLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE:

Congratulations men, WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.cnbc.com/id/28873174

LONG LIVE VINCE!

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CALL TO ARMS!!!!!!

http://www.cnbc.com/id/28855631/

VOTE SHAMWOW!!!!!!

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Thank you for your time...

Well, if you hadn't noticed, I like to play around with egg timers. I've always been into egg related gadgets, but lately egg timers have really grabbed my attention, mainly because I like to play with the latest spring and gear technology. Something about the fact that you can wind a spring and have it move a series of gears, while using far less power than a Ford F150 pickup truck, is interesting to me. It's fun to keep up with technology and realize we are getting closer to springs and gears powering other time-related devices in our homes, time related devices on our wrists and time related devices in our automobiles.

For now egg timers are still a useful thing to have around eggs, near boiling pots of water, at your family restaurant, etc. I would be surprised if people didn't have at least 13 egg timers around the home somewhere, in case their power goes out and they have to boil eggs on burning heaps of furniture without the convenience of a digital clock timer. Take these recent events with hurricanes. Millions of people were left without electric range tops and are stuck with soggy undercooked eggs from Ike. And what kind of timing devices are they stuck with? Power efficient Timex wristwatches that are water resistant up to 500 feet, that require elderly people to push difficult, tiny buttons. Without current spring and gear technology these watches will surely stop accurate egg cooking in a matter of years.

So I thought I would recommend some basic egg timers that use cutting edge springs and gears, which are very efficient and provide timed runs, better eggs, etc...

For those who want an egg-shaped egg timer, I recommend the 'Boiled Egg Timer'. This timer will run off any wrist crank, and will run at full power for whatever time you crank it to, before stopping with a loud ding. I have gotten over 54 minutes of egg cooking time in a single twist of my wrist. Now this timer isn't super loud, the ding is only about 70 decibels and has a slight aluminum resonance. This is designed as a close proximity timer that will give you enough ding if you are only 20 feet away.

It's available in one color here:

Boiled Egg Timer

It runs $10 shipped (shipping is WAY more than the egg timer). It's a tough little sucker too, I smashed it into the floor 2 times before it exploded in a wonderful display of flying cogs and razor sharp spiral springs.

For those of you who want something more exciting, with a lot more minutes, check out the Retro Look 60min Kitchen Egg Timer, which is listed on a different site. I keep one of these in my bedroom and our Forum Mod Luis has been using one to time the response time of the US/Mexican border patrol. It's a lot of fun! At $10.99 it's not for everyone, but it's a fun little egg timer and it will impress people when you crank it all the way to 60 minutes. You can use rechargeable wrist cranks in it, just read the specs here:

Retro Look 60min Kitchen Egg Timer

There is a special technique of turning the dial after a ding that can convert this 60 minute egg timer into a TWO HOUR TIMER, but it'll void the warranty if you turn it with a hammer drill. If someone figures out how to supercharge this bad boy to 3 hours, PM me :)

There are all kinds of other cool egg timers on that site too, but I wanted to point out those two because I couldn't be assed to google for any other egg timers for a half-assed parody post. Besides, they are both great and will make sure you have the awesomest, most fun egg cooking experience ever!

This isn't intended to be a sale's pitch, but of you do buy an egg timer, I expect a fucking commission for passing my helpful suggestions based on 5 minutes of research. After hearing about how many people have bought egg timers at wal-mart and target, I wish I had made this post sooner... it could have saved lives....

Just wanted to drop a note here for anyone interested in hearing about the progress of the Flash API.

Over the past few weeks we've had some isolated hiccups that have required our attention, so getting the issues with the Ad stats has been a bit of a trial. We're all back on track now, and I am just now taking my first break from updating the Ad/API scripts to address all the current bugs.

The only major bug right now is that something got jacked up with the script that loads in your earnings stats from the ad company. The dates that it was storing stats under weren't being set correctly resulting in one of two scenarios: users show NO stats for a given month or users show double what they should.

This bug only effects the archives stats, your current daily and current month stats should be working just fine still.

The fix to this issue is nearly complete, so all your stats will eventually get deleted and be re-imported directly from the ad company without any of these date bugs causing problems.

One update that HAS been completed is the addition of the payment address form. If you are using flash ads and haven't filled this out yet, you'll need to get it done before the end of the month so we can pay you.

The next updates will be geared to making the API setup pages less confusing and getting stat pages for all your custom stats and lists of who is hosting your movies.

We're even working on a system to set up revenue splits for multiple authors, so that should be up really soon as well.

Okay, my break is over... back to the trenches!